Look at Me! I Need Help!
08 September 2024
I taught high school for many years before teaching college. I also sponsored student organizations to make a difference in young people’s lives. I was quite cognizant of the fact that I was not going to “save” all my students, but I could help some navigate the mean, wide world out there.
Teaching is the best job in the world. What I mean by teaching, though, is not just imparting knowledge (that is the easy part!). Teachers must create this sort of difficult balance: you are the teacher, i.e., the rule enforcer, but, at the same time, you want to be that “someone” your students can turn to in case of need, and the hardest part is creating that trust. Students need to know that you care.
"I was being bullied."
Additionally, not only teachers must understand the varied needs their students bring to the classroom, but they must also pay attention to the nuanced changes their students experience, not just in their academic performance, but especially in their personal lives. Why has their demeanor changed? Why are they covering themselves with baggy clothing, while a month ago they were showing skin? A couple of years ago, I posted something on Facebook about Suicide Awareness Month. Unexpectedly, I got a message from a former student who took my class in the nineties. I am going to call her Betsy. She was and still is a super smart, kind, and beautiful woman, the typical student who, you might think, had everything going their way. Betsy wrote that one day, I had pulled her out of class. In the hallway, I asked her what was going on with her because I had noticed that she was “out of sync.” I do not recall doing it, but she did and added: “That day, you saved my life!” She explained that she had ideated suicide, but when she saw how worried I was, she had changed her mind. “But why suicide? You, Betsy?” As these questions crossed my mind, I kept reading her message: “I was being bullied” she said. That day, in the hallway, she did not say anything: she probably smiled and promised to do better. This confession took me by surprise, and all I could think about was: “What if I had not called her outside? What if I had not noticed the change in her demeanor?” I had literally saved her life.
Today, even if I teach college, I encourage my students to speak up and use the resources they have available on campus. We must be vigilant, and we must stop stigmatizing mental health because if we do, we will save lives.