What's Considered Self-care?
Acacia Moore
"Instead of thinking about what you don’t have or what you can’t get because you don’t make enough money, you’re not receiving child support, or whatever, think about the peace that comes with all your bills being paid."
Not too long ago, I got caught up in the trend of self-care. I started taking myself to dinner, allowing myself to go to Happy Hours, getting my nails done every two weeks, and making sure my hair was always done. I was doing all this because I deserved it, right? Right… kind of.
I work hard. I’m a good mom to both of my boys. My life revolves around them. This is what I told myself each time I swiped my debit card, praying the transaction didn’t decline. But on the other side of that was constantly being worried that my car was going to get repossessed in the middle of the night (or worse, while I was at work). Or dreading walking up to my front door because I knew sooner or later there would be a “Notice to Vacate” letter shoved underneath my door.
But hey, my nails were done, and my hair was on point! I was taking care of myself, right?
NOPE. All the way WRONG!
Ladies, do you deserve to get your nails done? Yes. Mothers, should you be allowed to go to happy hour every now and then? Of course. Should we be able to buy ourselves something without feeling guilty, especially when we will drop $200 on a pair of shoes for our kids without a question? Most definitely.
But let me tell you what you deserve more. Peace. You deserve peace knowing that your car is safe, you will have a roof over your head, and your lights will not get cut off in the middle of summer in Houston, Texas. That is worth so much more than a fresh set of nails and a nicely laid wig.
Instead of thinking about what you don’t have or what you can’t get because you don’t make enough money, you’re not receiving child support, or whatever, think about the peace that comes with all your bills being paid. Let me tell you, there’s nothing like it.
Currently, my nails aren’t done. I’m rocking my natural hair in all its glory, but my bills are paid, and I have enough money in my savings to handle an unexpected expense. I know that one day, and one day soon, I will be able to treat myself to the luxuries of self-care, but right now, the only self-care I’m worried about is paying my bills on time.
If self-care is stealing your peace, killing your joy, and destroying your bank account – it’s not self-care, but it’s a photo op for Instagram or TikTok. Be careful. When we place our self-worth in nothing but self-care…Houston, we have a problem.
Now, I’m not saying that self-care isn’t valuable. What I am saying is for it not to let it rule or dictate your life. Write it down. Put it in your budget. Plan for it.
Paying your bills is self-care!