J. Monique Gambles, LMFT
Don't Be Afraid: Keep Your Grass Cut Low
08 April 2024
Growing up in church, the reference to snakes as the biggest enemy and symbol of evil or the devil was a common trope. But if you studied snakes, you would learn that they don’t go after humans intentionally. They attack if they feel threatened. Stay out of their way, and they will leave you alone. Simple. But that’s not what I was taught. Anything negative, evil, or wicked was associated with it. I developed a fear of them until I learned more about them.
Up until that point, my fear of them was used against me. That’s no coincidence. If you want to control someone, all you must do is learn their fears. Sadly, many fall into traps of their fears while others control their fate. Fear is a natural response. But it’s a response that must be temporary in passing or used as a trigger to begin protecting yourself or becoming aware of your surroundings.
"You understand how to make your next move."
The phrase, face your fears is no coincidence either. If you hide, avoid, suppress, or numb fear, you risk losing yourself or opportunities. Not the cliché fear of missing out but missing out on the opportunities to contribute to societal needs or even legacy work. You must keep your grass cut low and be ready for whatever may come. Learn behavior and study the types of people outside of erroneous claims ascribed to genders and races.
Jealous and envious individuals will always bring you trouble in some form. Avoid them and minimize future losses. A Controlling individual will prevent you from outshining them. Fake individuals should never be trusted. They have a difficult time being authentic. You will have a hard time keeping up with their lies. Waiting for the truth is a waste of valuable time. They are comfortable even telling themselves lies. Truthtellers make people feel uncomfortable because lies create fantasy. Some people enjoy fantasy because they are fearful of their realities and the work to develop better ones. Lazy people will always convince you to carry their load and rebuke teamwork—they don’t want to do anything, even small tasks. Your progress will stagnate, relying on them. Gifted and talented individuals are almost always shunned because they are programmed to think outside the box for change and advancement. Free thinking poses a threat to control and is portrayed as chaos. Stingy and selfish individuals are greedy and care only about themselves. You will always feel a sense of emptiness in their presence. There is no fine line between pride and being proud. Too much, and both lead to a fall. Religious people care about the rules and not relationships. When you understand that, you will understand why some can support acts of hatred and evil or willfully engage in them.
Becoming self-aware, you know who you are as it relates to others. You also become aware of others too. You understand how to make your next move. Change. Grow. Remove. Accept.
“Never re-friend a person that tried to destroy your character, your money, or your relationships. A snake only sheds its skin to become a bigger snake.”
• George Clooney